puja-shah

This whole weekend, I have been engrossed in spending time with my sister.

We went hiking, talked, stayed up until 4 am the other night, just…being sisters.

I haven’t written much…but talked to her a lot about my ideas, goals and feelings about my story, my challenge. And it felt good talking about it.

Maybe part of this challenge, is actually developing the ideas that entail completing it, rather than just the stories, because as a whole, they both need development.

As much as I have been editing myself, (I gave my story about Chinese culture/ancient Chinese play) to my sister to read and she gave me some input since she is am Acupuncture/Chinese medicine student, but think that after her input, a good idea would be to perhaps send my work, all of it, to a professional editor for fine tuning.

I need to see how long this will take, what the costs are, and what they do to see if it is worth it. though. It’s all so new for me that figuring it out is part of my challenge…

Do you ever dream about something and then wish you had written it down?

Lately, with this story, I will have dreams about it, about events and details and character development, their thoughts, feelings, ideas…

and wake up wishing I was writing it down the whole time.

The latest dream involved something about Mumbai’s train station. Let’s see where that image takes me…

My sister came to visit me tonight.

I got home from work and was exhausted, but we were together, in the same room, after so many months and it felt like she was always here. Didn’t feel like we had been apart for so long, and since she had some work to do for school, I picked up my computer and started writing.

Talk about real inspiration- her presence just kept the words flowing

Sometimes sisters don’t even have to tell eachother what the other is thinking…

they just know it.

In my story right now, especially since Amla and Asya are twins, they have an intuition about the other’s thoughts, feelings, emotions and so far they have been together the whole time. I am coming to a part of the story where they will no longer be together, but are separated, not by choice, and how they have the same connected feeling, even being apart.

While ago, when I first started out my story, 20 or more days ago, I had posted about developing the whole idea of this sixth sense, and wondering if, being twin sisters makes it’s stronger than with anyone else, thinking it would just happen naturally with my characters if it were true…which I am seeing unfold in my story now, which feels pretty awesome that it happened on it’s own.

Today I am off to see Paul Oakenfold who is spinning at the Hard Rock Hotel here in San Diego for ‘Intervention’. I know that there won’t be much writing going on for me today especially after I get back, but realize it’s breaks like this where my creative energy gets fed and hopefully tomorrow then will be productive day

As the days goes by, I wonder if I will really finish, (I haven’t even finished this last story). Anxiety hits me and I have to remind myself what this challenge is about.

About it really happening.

About believing that it will happen, not questioning if it will.

With that, I’m off to write more

My sister called me today and was upset about her life spiraling out of control, with school, work, the things that can take over, even her, the hippie at heart that she is…

I understood that sometimes that’s all you need. Your sister to lean on, talk to, make you laugh.

I just wrote a part of my story where this happens…Amla is the sister that when she feel this way, leans on Asya for support, for guidance, for love. And when Asya does it, Amla realizes that this is their bond.

And in my real life, I can see how real that bond is.

Definition of an author on Wikipedia:

“An author (sometimes, in reference to a woman author, authoress) is defined both as “the person who originates or gives existence to anything” and that authorship determines responsibility for what is created. The second entry goes on to clarify that, when using the term “author,” the “anything” which is created is most usually associated with written work.”

Giving existence to something…

So by creating emotion through words, by sharing my heart on paper, by giving existence to characters and their story, their actions, their thoughts, their feelings…

I am an author…or as Wiki puts it, an authoress.

Cool

Today is the mid-way point for my challenge.

45 days completed. 45 more to go.

I decided I needed to make a checklist for what I have left to do…

-finish my sisters’ story

-edit all stores

-contact self publishing web site/service

-market book via different mediums

This doesn’t seem like a huge list of things to do…but they are huge things to do!!! Editing itself can take a long time, and so I need to set mini timeline goals for myself. I need to have ALL STORIES , including ones I have written in the past that I want to include in the book, edited by the end of the month. That seems like a long time away, but I still need to finish up one story and edit almost 8-10 total stories myself. Not easy, but if I finish by the end of April, it will then give me at least one month for the publishing and marketing part of it all, which I have heard can take longer, so hopefully it doesn’t!

So, in summary… reflecting on my mid-challenge what I have left to do crisis here…

I’ve got a lot of work :/

Just a little poem I wrote…not related to my story, but about sisters. And a little poetry here and there keeps the writing goddess in me happy

Sisters.

Like you I have our mother’s eyes,

Almond shaped,

but your’s have more brown in them than mine,

Like you I have our father’s nose,

Long and slender,

Like your long legs from our grandfather,

My broad shoulders from the same ancestor.

Like you I like reading novels,

You curled up in bed,

Flipping pages,

As I snuck a peak behind your bedroom door,

Just to see what you were reading.

Like you I love music,

But

Found my own beats, making me…

Different than you,

but

always

it was something I never wanted to be,

different than you.

I wanted

To laugh like you,

Smile and tilt my head back,

The way everyone around you loved to see you do.

I wanted to smell like you,

And sprayed your lilac perfume from your dresser when you weren’t home.

And then,

I started becoming less and less like you,

I liked patchouli instead of lilac,

Squinted my eyes when I laughed,

Like our grandmother, instead of you,

and I was

different than you.

But you crept up…

In my walk,

And someone would say, “You walk just like your sister, I thought it was her from behind”

Or the way we answered the phone,

“Is that you?”

They would ask on the other line.

“I thought…

You were your sister.”

And when you moved,

Far away,

I felt you near me,

Inside,

When I cried that night,

And you called me,

“Are you okay?” you asked,

“I was upset how did you know?”

“Just because…” you said.

You’re my sister, my heart knew.